barmecide ~ (adj) illusory or imaginary and therefore, disappointing. there once was a boy i knew, back when i was tall enough to reach my father's knee:
apricity ~ (n) the warmth of the sun in winter. there is a flower here that grows pink and pale like my winterkissed cheeks.
when our bones break i do not hear your screams, i hear only the laughter of a lazy afternoon, trickling in through the pain, comforting me keeping the tears away;
courage does not sit well on our shoulders. they were only meant to bear the weight of words about four syllables heavy;
"what is it like? losing a mother?" ~ it is like the horrific idea of never feeling the warmest of hugs or the tiniest of kisses brimming with a love unique to the laws of maternity.
mornings are the hardest, you know; apart from waking up to a reality without you, i spend them on the terrace and look toward the sky trying to talk to you, trying to tell you things which words can never do justice to; i mull that day over and over in my head trying to... Continue Reading →
do you remember all those times i cried over petty things and you would tell me to quit it, put my chin up and face the world? well, those words did not reach my brain. because i did not follow your advice. didn't follow it when i saw my worst nightmare unfold in front of... Continue Reading →
grief is a funny emotion, Amma. you spend the days before it hits believing that it paints our lives in monochromatic shades, but no; you are left with a set of color pencils wondering what shade your grief will take; my grief is a different shade every day. my grief looks like a rainbow on... Continue Reading →
on the 1st of August, 2017, a day and few hours after you left, thatha walked up to me and asked me if i'd write you an eulogy. i did not think it possible for my heart to shatter any further than it already had, but it did. he was smiling, just like i was;... Continue Reading →